By MATT GIANQUINTO
I learned more about Joe the Plumber than either John McCain or Barack Obama during Wednesday night’s final presidential debate. It wasn’t what I tuned in for, but it made for entertaining radio. This past weekend, a man in Ohio named Joe Wurzelbacher apparently approached Obama to let him know that his plans for the presidency were going to put a damper on his own plans for the plumb-idency. In short, if Joe bought the business he worked for he might then qualify for a higher tax bracket.
This was, for the McCain campaign, a terrific story to be sure: a working-class hero who played by the rules, a single father chasing after the American dream. And this story even had a happy ending for McCain–just when our hero was ready to make that dream come true, the Democrats nailed him with higher taxes while whispering tales of socialized medicine in his ear.
It was more than a good story for John McCain to use, this was the silver bullet he had dreamt of since the embarrassment of having to wave a white flag in Michigan. This could put a stop to all the lovey-dovey weak-kneed teary-eyed garbage those lousy liberal scumbags have been hanging over his head with this Obama guy since he first slithered out of Chicago. This was dollars and cents stuff, pocketbook politics that no one could refute. Republicans like you and your dog. Democrats want to mug you and leave your children crying over your penniless, broken body in the alley.
Except of course, for the fact that none of it was true. Well, the guy’s middle name is Joe, so that part is almost true. We’ll give McCain a point for that one.
I’ll leave it to the New York Times:
Turns out that “Joe the Plumber,”…may run a plumbing business but he is not a licensed plumber…His full name is Samuel J. Wurzelbacher…And he owes a bit in back taxes…The premise of his question to Mr. Obama about taxes may also be flawed, according to tax analysts…An official at Local 50 of the plumber’s union, based in Toledo, said Mr. Wurzelbacher does not hold a license. He also has never served an apprenticeship and does not belong to the union. (The national plumber’s union, the United Association of Plumbers, Steamfitters, and Service Mechanics, endorsed Mr. Obama, it should be noted.)
And so the silver bullet melted like a Werther’s Original behind the uncomfortable smile of our favorite Maverick.
Now, Obama isn’t exactly against putting on a good show (see: Obama-opolis at the acceptance speech) or inviting everyone to gleam deep meaning from otherwise pointless, generic encounters (the “pie” stump speech this week was meandering at best) but at least he has the decency to give the truth more than a passing glance before casting it aside in the wake of his own ambition as McCain continues to do.
So it turns out that Sam the Plumber isn’t anything like this guy Joe the Plumber we were introduced to last night. Sam doesn’t play by the rules–if he did he would pay his taxes like everyone else. If he played by the rules he would hold a license. Sam has never been trained as a plumber nor been a union member as his Facebook page apparently purports.
While that one was a whopper, the biggest lie during the last debate was not about Sam, or Joe or any other plumber, no–it was that John McCain continued to argue he is on the side of people like them. The biggest lie is that the McCain economic plan gives any more consideration to working and middle class people than he gave to vetting Sarah Palin as a running mate or looking into Wurzelbacher’s story before spewing a folksy pile of crap all over Bob Schieffer’s note cards.
While the lie was large, McCain’s cohones were bigger for committing to it. Larger still is the shame when you consider how guys like Sam, if they were really interested in playing by the rules, might realize how much better off they’d be with Barack Obama in the White House. Maybe he could finally get that license by taking advantage of Obama’s expanded apprenticeship program proposal. He might save a little money when his daughter wants to go to college because of the incredible investment Obama wants to see in higher education spending.
Oh yeah, and there is still that issue of taxes. I hope Sam still gets to buy the business. Assuming he doesn’t keep every dollar the business makes (maybe he’d give someone else a job too), and trusting (warily of course, I mean it’s Sam) that the business would make $250,000-$280,000 a year, Sam has not just chased but caught that American Dream all without a tax increase. How? Because Barack Obama’s plan protects people like Sam up to $250,000 of personal income for just that reason–to allow them the opportunity to make something of themselves.
Raising the ceiling of opportunity in America has always been what the Republican Party is best at: regulation stifles profit; higher wages takes away from possible investments elsewhere; government just gets in the way of progress. Clear the way and start the race. Every man for himself.
Raising the floor from which we all start the race has always been at the heart of the modern Democratic Party: regulation prevents corruption; higher wages and good benefits make for a more stable and vibrant economy; real progress is only made when some basic protections are guaranteed, and if the government has to be the one to guarantee them, so be it. Mark the race path, go over the rules, wish everyone luck and blow the whistle.
I think about the last eight years like this: Maybe if people like Sam would stop staring into the sun and look around for a few minutes, they’d be able to see how far they’ve fallen, and they might want a lift. They might then notice that’s exactly what Barack Obama has been offering them all along.
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